Sunday, November 18, 2007


I am a member of several Indiana adoptee groups. They are all listed on yahoo groups. I have been using them to help promote adoptee access in the state of Indiana. The folks that actually live in Indiana have the power to change things. A few others and myself don't have that. We can write and the Indiana legislators just pat us on the head.

Even though a few people have written their response to Katrina Carlisle in support, I have not censored them. I have pointed out the flaws in their logic. Maybe they have listened and maybe not. It is not for me to be worried about. Two of these individuals are like me. We just don't have much power. One is in Illinois and the other is Colorado. This information is because I have a sitemeter at the bottom of this blog.

There was a discussion about Ms. Carlisle. Some good and some bad. I didn't get off work until late. I wrote up a response and it was censored. It was not really explained. All this woman said was that she received complaints. I sent the email to a couple of other members. Now one of them is wondering if this woman has censored them.

This is the email and her response to it.

Enough already Amy....I choose not to post this because of the manycomplaints....let's drop the subject now...Okay?Patti

Okay I didn't want to start any fighting. That is the last thing I want to do. If anything, we need to direct our anger at the system that has been created to appease us while its protecting the adoption industry. That is what its doing. My natural mother was contacted by Katrina. Okay I was told some very misleading information by her. She told me that she would be the only CI that I could use in the state of Indiana. She also told methat my natural father wanted me but since my natural mother refused contact she could not make contact with him. She cowrote a book on adoption. She is an adoptive parent. She is also the former director of Coleman adoption agency before they merged with St. Elizabeth. The law states "birth parent." She told me only the natural mother can be contacted. Again nothing in the law nor the DCF handbook. Trust me I have read both and quoted both. There is also no restriction on the number of times a natural parent or adoptee can be contacted. She told me that she could only contact them once. I paid 325.00 bucks to have the records read to me and have what little non identifying information gleamed just once. That for me is a great deal of money.I had at that time and I wasted it. I also heard my same story come from another adoptee's mouth. It was almost word for word. I have spoken with another daughter of a Coleman mother who was there at the same time.There was no other woman there with her. I don't believe anything that she has told me. I had another chance with Lori but I chose not to. I am not giving the industry nor the state another damn dime of my hard earned money. Money that belongs to my kids. I did speak with Lor iat length. She told me that most CIs in Indiana avoid Coleman adoptees and natural parents because the cost is still the same. 325.00 bucks for Lori to look at the records and Katrina to look at the records. Fort Wayne Catholic Charities only charges CIs 50.00bucks. There is major discreptancies with Katrina. Maybe my natural mother got mad at Katrina. Judging how I am about people., I could see that. Maybe something about my natural mother rubbed Katrina thewrong way. Recently Katrina found my Coleman Moms and Babes blog. She sent three adoptees my way to comment for a week on my blog. How happy they were that they were refused. One was happy to be reunited. After quoting the law,the two that weren't reunited stopped commenting. They did however start reading. I don't know if they are writing the Indiana legislators but I gave them the same information that I gave you. I want to empower you. You have the support of us that live outside thestate of Indiana. Now I know we have quite a few natural mothers and adoptees on this email list. I know via another Coleman mother how she was treated at Coleman. That image will forever haunt me. It will always be a punch in my gut. I don't want that for another mother, adoptee or family members of us. One of the ways to make these agencieshonest is adoptee and their families' access open. Adoption is aboutus not the adoption agency nor the attorney. We are mature adults who can handle our information. I am a Desert Storm veteran. I used to be a letter carrier for the USPS. I now handle thousands of dollars for customers paying their cell phone bills. I am a mother, wife, daughter of 2 women, petowner, and many other things. I vote and I pay taxes. If I am responsible to carry a weapon for my country, deliver mail and handleother people's money, then I am responsible enough to handle myinformation. I am sure that this applies to all of us. It is not about who had a good experience or who had a bad experience. We should not have to be humiliated for wanting our truth, our records, and our heritage. We must write the legislators and tell them how we feel. We must keep it at a civil rights issue. The natural mothers must write and tell them that they weren't promised confidentiality. Adoptees must write and tell them that wewant our fourth amendment rights given back to us and that the stateis violating our right to privacy as they are invading it and holding our documents in seizure. To be honest natural mothers must do the same. It is not about the right to reunion or medical history. This is how Oregon, New Hampshire, Alabama and Maine were won. We have the court cases in both Oregon and Tennessee backing us up. We have the statistics from these states as well. After speaking with literally thousands of mothers across this country, they back us. Seeing that adoptive parents now wanting access for their children, we need to get the state out of our business.

So I decided to put this on this blog. I won't be censored. If I am booted, others will know why and will move away from that group. We have enough to deal with the state of Indiana and the adoption agencies censoring us.

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